Monday, 4 January 2016

Back to bore you!

So its the start of 2016 and I haven't blogged for over a year. The reason, who knows? Perhaps apathy, being busy or not making the time. I always enjoyed my rambling and after a pal started up his wonderful blog of recipes and other such gastronomic wonderment; I thought to myself maybe I should return to letters from Jersey.

It could be argued that it is no longer "a northern girls start on a new life". Its been 5 years in Jersey and no longer can be thought of as "new" but just "my life".
What a life it has been. I had a 5 year plan to go back home if things didnt turn out and although a challenge at times I am still here; for that I am glad.

The next chapter, I am getting married which hasn't sunk in yet. First stage of planning a wedding is GET THIN!!!
Well I say thin I mean less portly. I am no stranger to dieting and have tried many a plan. However now I am older and can afford cocktails till they come out my ears unlike my drinking  20/20 days, I don't appear to have self control. Policing myself with dieting was not really a practical option as I have come to justify cheating. So back to class I went starting this evening.

My new class is not like anything I have attended. The person that runs it is quite bouncy in an energetic way. I can think myself less portly just by being exhausted by watching her.
Previous class experiences have involved a woman that looked like the back end of a bus and smoked 100 B&H a day I am sure. In her gravely voice she would start with "you're not Bonnie your fat". She didn't bother me in her words of self esteem bashing as I used to sit there and think " at least I don't look like the back end of a bus". However I could see how she might not encourage people to return to class. I used to keep going just for the entertainment of "Bonnie bus bitch" as I started to affectionately to call her.

My new leader of all things less portly could never be referred to as that as she is quite lovely and inspirational. Oh the other different aspect of attending class is errrr Andrew. On further discussion of joining a class he remarked "I will come with you, it will be supportive". Now I heard you readers, you did a little "awww" but I think that had we been at secondary school together we probably wouldn't of been pals.

I have never attended some form of course with Andrew and hadn't anticipated what kind of student he was going to be. Well as he was the only one that had his name referred to 3 times during the class  by "teacher", I suspect I will have to move seats. Now I love him dearly, I must do I said yes but I think he might get thinner because of the constant poking I do of  his ribs.. Firstly he is the kid that can't sit still and makes more noise trying to adjust his comfort. The fidgeting, the rustling the crossing and uncrossing of his legs that sounds like a gale force wind is somewhat distracting.  I glare! Then its the bobbing of the head looking round. When I ask what he is doing he says "I am doing a head count". I glare again and whisper concentrate.

Now perhaps I am being too harsh but you know that kid that asks teacher a question right at home time as you are packing your bag away and have one arm in your coat. Well that's ANDREW!
On the way home in the car we were discussing his sense of ermmm irritation to which he asked can you have extras on this diet? I didn't like to enquire what extras he wanted. We have concluded I will just tell him what to do and eat what I give him, it seemed a better solution.

So that's the start of it, the year, the getting thin, the planning of a wedding. I will try not to bore you with the ramblings but they are a coming.