I'm back...I think!

So there I was in M&S changing rooms trying on a bargain jumper priced 4 quid. Getting it over my head was a little challenging, but putting my arms through required huffing and puffing. I persevered, its only 4 quid! As I rolled it down over my womanly bits, slight breathlessness ensued, but no its only 4 quid echoed in my noggin. As I stood there looking in the mirror at myself, a bag of King Edwards in a cropped top; I thought is this what life has come to? Removing the jumper resulted in a panic wrestle. A little faint, I thought I don't want to be taken to ED and cut out of a jumper. Dramatic I know, but trying to peel off a size 8 jumper ( those ruddy sales assistants putting the wrong hanger in too small jumpers) was an ordeal. Sitting on the floor trying to regain my composure, I thought why don't I blog anymore, so readers here I am!

Its been a while, so I will bring you up to speed I lost weight, got married, got fat, wanted a new career, decided I didn't want a new career, sent a child to university, prepping another child for university, had nice holibobs, no holibobs saving for a house, bought house in France, went out a lot, decided not to go out a lot and still fat.

Not very exciting I know but I have come to realise life isn't a Hollywood movie and I am no Angelina Jolie. Life is the washing machine, Waitrose, frustration and joy of work, telling your husband to stop eating Bakewell tarts and answering repeated questions like "whats for dinner". That's why its so important to laugh at the ridiculous, like trying to wriggle into a jumper considerably smaller than your body.

Year of getting married me!

What the hell happened me!

I started this blog as a form of cathartic amusement and I need to get back to writing and sharing ridiculous adventures of my stupidity. I also need to get unfat. Year of getting married me is a better version of current me, excited about my new post shower, strawberry hair wrap!!!


The only consistent thing since getting married is the idiocy of the husband and that I wouldn't change. So to you leave with something that makes me laugh even when I don't feel like it, I give you the husband. Hopefully I have returned to my blog to share inane rambling and nonsense.